New Year's is a time of New Beginnings. But what about the lessons we learned in the previous 12 months?
This episode is all about those lessons and putting down what no longer services us.
Join Cam and Amelia as we discuss the Top 5 things we are leaving behind as we look forward to the New Year.
What are you ready to leave behind?
00:00 Shooting life away, a play on words.
05:14 Release need for comebacks, be authentic.
06:39 Reframe "should" to "I get to."
09:27 Self-doubt and rushing, need for self-reflection.
15:40 Receiving help, recognizing need for self-care.
17:34 Hiring a young virtual assistant empowers growth.
19:18 Finding balance between work and rest.
22:58 Funny story about declining social commitments gracefully.
26:51 Visualization of protection and safety in bubble wrap.
28:50 Check show description for contact information.
Stay Connected!
Amelia
Cam
Midlife Mommas IG: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.mommas/
Please share, rate, and review the podcast. We appreciate you! ❤️
New Year's is a time of New Beginnings. But what about the lessons we learned in the previous 12 months?
This episode is all about those lessons and putting down what no longer services us.
Join Cam and Amelia as we discuss the Top 5 things we are leaving behind as we look forward to the New Year.
What are you ready to leave behind?
00:00 Shooting life away, a play on words.
05:14 Release need for comebacks, be authentic.
06:39 Reframe "should" to "I get to."
09:27 Self-doubt and rushing, need for self-reflection.
15:40 Receiving help, recognizing need for self-care.
17:34 Hiring a young virtual assistant empowers growth.
19:18 Finding balance between work and rest.
22:58 Funny story about declining social commitments gracefully.
26:51 Visualization of protection and safety in bubble wrap.
28:50 Check show description for contact information.
Stay Connected!
Amelia
Cam
Midlife Mommas IG: https://www.instagram.com/midlife.mommas/
Please share, rate, and review the podcast. We appreciate you! ❤️
Things were leaving behind in 2023. Boy, if I got a list. What about you, Cam? Oh, yeah. I can't wait to hear your list. Hi. I'm Cam, holistic health coach, mom to 2 humans and 4 pets. List. Hi. I'm Amelia, laboratory scientist by day and food scientist by night. Welcome to our show. Join us as we share our holistic list. Approach to life after 50. You can expect real life stories with a dash of humor and a ton of truth. If it happens in midlife, we're going to talk about it. List. So hit that subscribe button and follow along. We're the Midlife Mommas. List. Hello. Welcome to the last episode of the year 2023. I've always been a sucker for the end of the year countdown. How about you, Amelia? Did you always like list. Well, you know, I'm a big Christmas fan, so after Christmas, it's kinda coasting. But once we get to New Year's Eve, I don't stay up till midnight list. To usher in the new year. But I do enjoy, you know, sometimes newscast or you'll hear the songs of the year or the movies of the year, and I kinda dig those lists. List. So anything about, you know, a recap of the year, I'm kinda into it. That absolutely. I remember loving the, like, Casey k's and Tom Cruise. List. But I do also like the news shows. Like, you know, like, I I I don't know why. Like, people that passed away in the year. I don't know. I Midlife it. I Pay attention. And some of it, Cam, is because some of those people I may forget during the year. And I was like, oh, yeah. Because you know, at our age, actors that we grew up with list. Or musicians or famous people. You know, some of those have meaning from previous lives as it were. Yeah. Right. List. I love it. But you know, as in midlife, we talk about this a 1000 times and every episode it comes list. Where we talk about midlife being an awakening. And I think as we close out 2023, it's an appropriate time to to to really reflect list. On how this year has been and things were like, you know what? That doesn't service me anymore. I'm like washing my hands of this and moving on. List. Yeah. We're pruning the garden. Great analogy. We're wiping the chalkboard. We're starting with a clean slate, whatever it is. But yeah. List. So, the first one on our list is shoulding your life away. Like, I should do this, I should do that, I shouldn't do that, I shouldn't eat that, all that nonsense lens, we say to ourselves. And I love that because shooting your life away is a little bit of a play on a word that we may use list. In other context, but it's really appropriate here because at our age, you know, I don't know about you, Cam, but I list. In a lot of my twenties thirties being someone I wasn't being fault per se, but I did a lot of things that I thought I list. Should do. It may or may not have been what I wanted. What about you? Oh, totally. Yeah. Because I'm worried about what other people think or how does that look on your family or list. Yes. And all of the things, whether it's food or exercise or I don't know. Should you go to the party or not? Like, all the things. Yes. Absolutely. What brands you wear or what Pocketbook you carry or what car you drive or what activities you participate in or, you know, I like what you said, what parties or And if you don't get invited to the party or you don't have the things we worry, like we legitimately worry like, oh, I don't fit in. And so, fitting in is one of those list. Things is I always wanted to fit in, and that's a I don't need to fit in. I'm I'm me. I like me who I am. List. I know and I think that's like human nature to want be to be part of a group or to fit in. I've never felt like I fit in anywhere and it's so like, list. Awakening or I don't know what the word is like, a relief that you don't have to say. Yeah. Relief. That's it. Absolutely. Relief, I think, is good. And I think what the amazing thing about letting go of that, Cam, is that once you find yourself, people are attracted to that confidence, and they, list. Whether or not whether you're the CrossFit person or the triathlete or the chef or the entrepreneur or whatever you are, whatever your role is, list. When you sit securely in your own self, none of that matters. People are attracted to your positive energy, and I just think that's a beautiful thing. List. Yeah. And it's hard, like, tonight to, like, negotiate the negative self talk and, like, stop that. But when you find yourself saying I should do this or I should do that, list. Like, that's a warning sign or a red flag or, I don't know, a yield sign. A yield sign for sure. Yeah. And, you know, lip. I'm wondering when you feel those things, if you have that thought, do you get the pit in your stomach? Because you're a you feel things in your gut. List. So it it's either a lump in my throat, if it's something I need to say, or my stomach hurts. Yes. So your body does give you signals. If you slow Slow down enough, you'll be able to find out what your signals are, but those are my common ones. Do you have any common ones? Mine is more of a I'm more more of a heart person. So list. Mine is a heaviness in my heart. Sometimes it if it's really deep, it it's almost like something that literally travels from list. Heart to my stomach, but my stomach doesn't hurt. It's a heaviness. So I'm a heart I'm an I'm an in the heart person. But definitely, if if there's something I need to list. Let go of or you know? And here's the other thing, Cam. Sometimes I'll find myself wanting to have a comeback or a retort if someone says something negative, list. And I've learned to bite my tongue. So that's one thing I'd like to let go of of those thoughts and feelings I've needed to to even things up because I don't I don't need to have a reply to list. Everything and I don't have to set set the record straight. I mean, I can just be who I am and so that's one of the things I wanna let go of is try to have a reply. List. Yeah. No reply. Yeah. Send her out out to lunch. Sorry. Yeah. Yeah. And and, you know, it's funny because some of the people I admire both, like, list. They could be celebrities, but more importantly, real people. They're they're the quiet silent type, and I've had to learn how to be the quiet list. I'll tell you. I wanna talk about everything. That's mysterious. Isn't it though? But people that just are so confident in who they are, they don't have to have that list. Especially in a situation where it could be inflammatory. So I'm gonna stop being inflammatory. That's good for your health, Amelia. I know. I know. So true. Yeah. So when you find yourself saying I should do this or I shouldn't do that, a quick reframe is I get to. List. Like, literally, you have a choice on what you get to do, think, say, whatever it is. So just reframing it, I get to, and see if that helps put you in a more positive mindset list and more positive action. I don't know. Might help. Yeah. Exactly. And I think if you say I get to, it reframes it in a way to know, is this list. True and something I get to do that's positive, or was the should something that you were doing for someone else? Mhmm. You know what I mean? Like, if it's like I I don't I can't think of a really good example, but I think that I get to as a great reframe to test the validity of this thing list. And whether or not it's a it's a valid choice. I I love that. And I really think it goes to whatever it you're whatever you're looking for is already inside of you, And it's not outside of you. It's not external. I've I feel like this business lesson keeps coming up and over and during during recent coaching calls, like, list. The answer is always within you. It's never searching for something outside. And so if you're shoulding, you are literally like shaming yourself list. And they're trying to get into action rather than looking at slowing down and looking inside. So I hope it's helpful. Yeah. I definitely think it is. I really appreciate that. Yeah. List. Yeah. I think, you know, how I would do that is, like, breathing. I've been really practicing my breathing and connecting to my heart like you mentioned, list. And feeling and acknowledging my emotions instead of just like trampling over myself or putting myself in a box of list, shame. Like, let's unpack it. Yeah. Good points. So the next one on our are we done with that with you? I think so. Yeah. Stop Stop the shoulds. Stop the shoulds. Yeah. So the next one is another really big one for me and it's negative self talk. And some of this list. Is these are thoughts that may crop up almost without my knowing it. And we talk about this a lot as well. List. And my favorite, and I actually said this to my husband recently, I used your phrase of take your thoughts to court because a lot of my self list. Talk or negative thoughts are based on something I've assumed rather than something that's fact. Mhmm. So that negative self talk is very disruptive and it's a list. Terrible habit. And there was a time in my life where I thought that I couldn't control my thoughts and it's only been within the last probably since knowing you, Cam, honestly, that I've learned I lip. Can't control this. Yes. Absolutely. And I think it's funny, like, I I'll use my curly hair because I fought it for years. And, you know, like, list. I don't know where I picked that up and decided that that was not attractive, but I picked it up somewhere and I chose to put it down. But I was like, Every time you look in the mirror, you don't like what you see, that's really not good. Right. Yeah. Yeah. So it's okay not to believe everything you think. Lisp. Exactly. And and I don't have any well, I I have, similar to your curly hair, I guess I had that about my big thighs, but list. I have come to to kind of understand that that's just the way I cam, and I'm, you know, I'm loving myself for it. But my my negative self list. Talk because I'm an Enneagram three, so I'm a performer. It's more around performance Mhmm. And telling myself that I'm not doing a good job with no evidence whatsoever that that's list. True. And, you know, finding myself panicked about something or rushing through because, list. You know, whether my boss made a comment that wasn't meant to be any sort of criticism, it was just a comment about some task list list. Or a coworker or what what have you rushing through something. And I find that for me, I need to really slow down and take stock list. And really evaluate, you know, why do I feel this way? And really be honest, Cam, because there are times when I may have avoided list. Tasks. Mhmm. And that's part of that vicious cycle of self talk, but I've I've done that to myself. So, you know, really being, is there any value here? List. Is there action to be taken? Because sometimes in those times, I think the the best thing we can do is take some action, but some of it's just crap. Like, some of that negative self talk is just lip. Correct. Yeah. Do you find, like, your heart rate, increases or you get sweaty, like, you have physical reactions? A 100%. Oh, wow. A 100%. Lip. Absolutely. It kinda goes back to your body truly is communicating with you and just slowing down and saying, well, what does that mean? Like, what, you know, why is this happening? List. Yeah. But you have to actually do slow down and ask these questions. And when you're in that kind of fight or flight situation where you're you're perceived list. To be in danger. Not real, but you know what I mean. It you have all of that evaluation just takes seconds. You don't have to stop and, list. You know, for 5 hours. It's just like, what does this mean? Let's untangle what's real and what's not and let go of these assumptions that you've made about list. Whatever the negative thing is, whether it's your curly hair or your big thighs or, you know, what you turned in at work or, you know, it's not real. List. Yeah. The big thigh thing, the reframe, especially as a CrossFitter, those are like powerful. That's your engine. Like, that's Yeah. That's true. You don't wanna have little sticks walking around. You won't have power and big muscles. So that's how I would reframe that one. Yeah. And I love that. I love that you have list. A positive spin on things no matter what it is, you always have a way to reframe it that looks that that's positive, which is great. You know, I really think I learned that through my divorce and all that through my forties because it was list. Yuck. You know, it was yucky time and that you you know, it's just no way to live. I I'm not perfect at it by any means, but it cam a long way. Let's say that. So list. I'll acknowledge that win. Right. And, you know, being present with those emotions is important. I'm list. Kinda still in the process of learning that. I really thought for my whole life that I was in tune to that. And I think that's not maybe true that I was list. Creating a mental environment as a reaction to the emotion without recognizing the emotion itself if that lip. Makes any sense. Absolutely. And I've had to untangle that, and that's been hard. Yeah. So, the counselor I worked with in my forties through the divorce, list. He he would always say, emotions are in motion. They're moving in your body. Yes. Yeah. And he would always say, okay. Name, the emotion and where is it in your body and are you willing for it to get stronger or are you willing for it to leave? And so that was part of the he called it the map of emotions, but learning like lip. Physically, you have emotions physically in your body. You can name them and they will move. It's pretty cool. That and, you know, list. It sounds easy, Cam, but if you're a purse yeah. It's so hard. And if you're a person that wants to take this awakening journey, if you're feeling stuck in list. In a state, if you start doing this work, it's like, wow. It's so groundbreaking and simple, but very difficult. You know what I mean? I'm like Yeah. List. I think I think one of the ways a new way for me, like, in the last few months is to get in touch with my emotions through journaling, and I know you journal. Oh, that's great. Yeah. List. That's new to me. That's something I would judge my handwriting. I would judge it was so stupid. I'm serious. It's true. But lip. But I've gotten into that. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah. Well, you are a perfect you're the number one. Like, I know that about you. See, I list. I love to journal. I don't do it regularly, but I do it when I need to. And I feel inspired when I do it. But, yeah, I don't judge the whole. And sometimes, Cam, you would list. Paul, I'm left handed and left handed people generally don't have the best handwriting. So sometimes Midlife, I can't even read that out. I don't even know what that says, but list. I got that emotion out. I I wrote it out, so that was good. Next one we have is, you don't have to go at it alone. It's okay to ask for help. List. That's a great one. Yeah. I I think the first time I was aware of this lesson, and this was 2007. So here we are at the end of 23. So it's still not like list. A mastered lesson, but I'm ready to put it down. When I tore my ACL MCL water skiing in 2007, I was on crutches for months. List. I couldn't drive. I worked on the 3rd floor. I had to hobble all the way up to the 3rd floor. I did drive. I had to get to physical therapy, but I had 2 little kids and so list. Asking for help. That was the 1st time I learned remember asking for help. Like, I had to get a ride somewhere. Have you ever had that happen? List. I'm sure I have, but I have a question. How did it feel when you did it? Was it a sense of relief when you actually asked for the help you know? I was bitter. I was mad. I was list, honestly. Oh. We'll have to beat that out, but I was mad. But I also know now, I'm learning something about human design and list. My human design bitterness is a sign that I'm not resting enough, so it makes total sense now looking back to 2007. Yeah. I was embarrassed. List. Like, I should be able to do it on my own, like, and Yeah. Where we lived and where the physical therapy was, it was inconvenient and I was list. I was teaching school, so it was like after school. Like, you know, it I just you know, I didn't wanna take up that space or ask for that favor. List. It was hard. It was really hard, Emilia. That's so interesting. I mean, that doesn't resonate with me as much, and maybe list. Maybe I'm not recognizing it. I'm not sure. But when I had my cycling accident in 2012, I don't remember if I asked for help. People just did stuff, list. That I didn't really think about. I mean, for a week, I was on some pretty heavy narcotics for the pain because I had surgery, but list. And they would they would just do things for me or take me places or bring me food or whatever, and I don't know that I really realize it. I'll have to really sit with the whole help thing. List. And maybe this is a this is more of a sign that that I need to analyze this more. I feel like I recognize it in other people, list. Like my in laws or my mom, or other or even my husband. I feel like he puts him out himself out for other people to a point of his own detriment and I list. To remind him, you need to take care of yourself. I've always viewed myself as a fairly self centered person. Like, I'm gonna look out for myself. List. So I don't know whether this is reverse psychology and I need to, like, look at this more or if I'm truly just, like, I don't know. I'm working with an intuition coach right now, list. And she would say that that is a mirror to you. Anything that's coming up in somebody else that you're able to see is a mirror for yourself. List. Okay. I I then I need to sit with that. Like so not not just maybe this episode isn't just about leaving things and learning things about yourself. List. Well, anyway, that's what she would say because they or else you wouldn't be able to recognize it if it didn't exist in you. So where is it in your life and how does it apply? List. That's gonna be a fun journey. So Right. Exactly. Because one of the things about asking for help is and we know this and we've talked about it, is list. Tasking isn't a badge of honor, and I gotta be honest, I still do this. You know, you've had to teach me how to group list. Tasks and errands together and use time cushioning. I've had to learn that. That that I would have never thought about that on my own. List. So I probably still do this more. Just for instance, like, well, we don't we we have YouTube TV now and we do have Netflix. List. But on YouTube TV, there's still some commercials. And if I can't fast forward through it, I will literally pick up my phone during a commercial. So I'm still kinda doing a little bit of that list. Multitasking. So that may be that one of those big clues I need to pay attention to. It'll be a fun journey. It'll be a fun journey. List. Anyway, I'm willing to put it down. This year, I hired someone in my business, so I have a virtual assistant that helps me. Asking for help is amazing, and I love what she does for me, and I'm it's list. She's young. She's, like, in her mid twenties, and I feel like I'm empowering her and growing her in her business as she helps me with my business. So, list. You know, I'm willing to look at other things that where I need to ask for help, but I I've been leaning into it more since 2007. It's been a long time. Lip. Yeah. That's a long time, but it's wonderful that you realize that and that you're able to to break free from it and understand what you need. I love that. List. Yeah. Okay. Next 1 is go go go. Here's another really good one. Putting it down. I think we're yeah. We're list. We we come we're cut from the same cloth in this respect, Cam, from our respective background. So this is one I'm still working on as well. Yeah. So tell us your story lip. Yeah. So in my forties, I was on go mode, and that was the divorce and CrossFit and all that. I'm turning 55 this month in January. And, list. You know, when I turned 40, I was like, that was a really bad year. And then turned 50, I had the hysterectomy. But this year, I feel like list. It's a new awakening, if you will, and I feel like it's another layer of slowing down. It's not go go going. Like, I understand that my creativity and list. Restorative. All that happens in rest. When I have my best ideas is when I'm away from my phone or away from my computer, I'm out in nature or something like that. List. So I think it's like reconnecting to myself and understanding that rest is not lazy. It doesn't mean you're lazy. It just means you're taking care of yourself in a new way. I don't know. I think that's really good because I'm still I'm still I still do the go go go thing. List. And my example, you know, it's it tends to revolve around work, but there have been Saturday afternoons where I was truly tired, list. Long work week, and I would, you know, watch Netflix. And I've cared a lot of guilt about that. And oddly or not maybe not oddly at all. Maybe, you know, list. As you would expect, I was much more productive and feel on my game come Monday because I had allowed myself, my brain, my body to actually rest. So list. Recognizing that, and I no longer try to do 14 errands after work. I mean, you know, I mean, I did that for a long time list. Where? We all did. It all had to get done. Yeah. The dry cleaners, the grocery store, the whatever. And, of course, those were the years, Cam, when there was also kids to pick up. List. So, you know, I I would think nothing of getting home and starting to make dinner at
7:30, 8 o'clock at night. I mean, that was usual, list. And I can't even imagine that anymore. I mean, I don't know that I could sustain that, but it it it's a learning thing. Yeah. So if you look back on your younger years, I totally identify with list. Running all the errands. Like, I taught school and then then all the chaos happened after school, running, picking up kids, dinner, all the things. Yeah. I'm glad those days are over and I feel like list. Menopause midlife is a wonderful time to take better care of yourself. And so I've given up so much of the go go go. What I think is happening. When I'm feeling's happening is there's a next there another layer. The next layer of go go go is now going to be leaving, so I'm excited lip about it. That is really cool. Well, you know, we're just coming out of the holiday season, and I've always loved the idea list. Of going and hear a holiday concert or a holiday play. And we didn't do that except for we did go to the Christmas cantata at church. And after list. After that, we went to brunch with friends, which was enormously fun and satisfying. But I didn't add a public performance or a paid performance beyond that. List. And for a minute, a second, I was like, oh, I've missed out. No. I haven't missed out. I was enjoying something fun list. With my friends. And so, you know, we did we literally I don't think we had a single holiday party this year. Mhmm. We didn't either. Yeah. List. And I am not sorry. Like, I for a minute, I might have missed dressing up. But list. I don't know, Cam. It was great. Like, we it's been a very relaxing I had a fabulous Thanksgiving season with my children. Did not get to see them for Christmas and I'm not sad about that. I mean, they were enjoying their play where they live and so realizing that list. Specifically, the holidays don't have to be go go go. It kind of takes away the joy if you do go go go during the holidays. So I've really embraced that. List. I think you need it. Yeah. I think you need more time for rest and recovery. And, like, really, what do you really wanna do? Like, going to branch with your friends sounds lovely. Like, that's lovely. List. But if you had something planned after that and you had to rush through a to get to b, no. I'm done with that. No more of that. No. Me neither. And we Kinda go back to the shoulds Cam. Some of this is circular thinking. Right? So if you're going, going, going, are you going to meet someone else's expectation? And list. That's that's a tough self reflection. Yeah. Like, if you were supposed to go supposed to go to the party, that's a should. List. If you're going and you're planning, like, what if there had been a cookie exchange or something after your Right. Yeah. So would you have gone or would you have said nope? I'm I'm list. Doing this one thing really well. I'm gonna go to church and brunch, and then I'm going home. Well, it's funny funny you should say that because speaking of church, I'm on list. A committee and, we're we're finding we're doing a small group, next year and I asked a couple of people, list. If they were interested in leading a small group, and they were friends of mine. And I know 1 lady in particular, she was very gracious and she was like, well, list. I'm gonna decline because I've got x going on. And I was like, I really applauded that and thought how good for her list. To recognize that she's got more going on because I think now I would take stock and and decline politely, but there was a time when If I was invited to do something, girl, I was on it. Like, you better believe it. Like, I don't wanna be left out. So Yeah. Yeah. It's a different mindset. List. And mine would have been, well, what if they think what would they think of me if I didn't do it? Oh, I see. Exactly. It's the same coin, the different side of the same coin. List. Absolutely. But isn't it empowering to think and to have so much to have the confidence in yourself to think, list. Oh, I'm honored that you asked me to do this thing. And and I would say, you know, keep my name on the list for for future engagement, but I can't do it right now. Lip. And that's a beautiful thing. You're taking your power back. That's amazing. I think you do a very good job of having, like, parameters and boundaries around you. List. And that's a very gracious no. I'm not this isn't for me right now. The way you said that, like, it's not offensive, which actually goes to the next thing. Don't taking things personally. List. Don't or stop taking things personally. We're ready to put that down. Because if you were like, no. I'm not doing this or you said, list. Thank you so much for asking me. My plate is full right now. Like, that is a whole new way of accepting a no. List. Right. Exactly. And we've talked about the 4 agreements a 1000000000 times, but this is one of those. And, Cam, you admitted before we started that it might be the most difficult for you, list. And I didn't think it was until recently, and I think I'm gonna become more sensitive as I've gotten older. And I don't know I don't know why, list. But I do take things personally, and I really need to put that down because I can't control anyone else's emotions. And I don't need to own list. Own the intent. You know what? I I can only own my reaction. That's what I was gonna say because you have no idea what they're thinking. You don't know if they had a crummy day or an awesome day. You don't know list. What they meant, the only thing you can control is how you react to it. But it's really hard, especially if it's like a loved one or someone close to you. List. You know, it's easy to become offended. So Yeah. Yeah. So I'm I'm willing to try to put this one down, but I'm not guaranteeing it's gonna happen in 20 24. It might be a lean in process. That's right. And I think that's okay, and I think you're right. And what I've also found is that, list. If I take something personally, it it that also is a vicious cycle because, again, I want to have a comeback. I want to list. Attack the attack. And, usually, that's not helpful. I mean, I'm not always a huge fan of the turn the other cheek directive, but list. I think sometimes the best thing to do is not react and it diffuses the situation immediately. And again, you don't know what the other person's thinking, so it may not have been meant in any kind of way anyway. List. Yeah. The thing about not reacting, then you don't wanna carry it in your body because we'll go back to the ocean because I just you saying that, list. Okay. I might not say anything out loud. I probably wouldn't, but I would carry it in my heart or my throat, and then I would have a lump in my throat, and so list. It goes back to that. Yeah. Good point. So we're all built a little differently. So I think I don't know. List. Well, I know people that say, I don't care what anybody else thinks. But I think as human beings craving community, we do list. On some level, care what some people think. And I think we need to be in tune to that emotion and who are the people we care about list. And what is our response? Because we certainly don't want those negative we don't wanna internalize other people's negativity. Yeah. There was a time in my life in my forties, list. Like, I remember it was Gabby Bernstein teaching about how putting yourself in bubble bubble wrap and walking into a situation. List. And so sometimes that that visualization will help me. Like, if I'm walking into a situation, I am protected and safe in this bubble wrap, and anything that comes at me is just gonna list right off. Versus taking it on internally and getting that lump in my throat or raising my cortisol or whatever else response might happen if I decide to internalize it. Does that make sense? It does make sense and I think it's a great visual whether it's bubble wrap or a bubble or whatever, envisioning negative list. Things literally bouncing off your aura or your, you know, your presence is a beautiful way to look at it. So maybe if I walk in the situation with my bubble wrap, I'll be less personal. I'm taking it. Let's say it's personal. Anyway Good stuff. And I think I think that's list. If we are if we're honest with ourselves, we all could probably shed a little bit of of the whole taking things personally. That's a that's a good one. Yeah. List. So just to summarize our list of things we're leaving behind in 2023, we're leaving the shoulds behind. We're getting rid of our negative self talk. We're gonna take those spots to court. We're going to not go at it alone. We're gonna learn how to ask for help. That is not a sign of weakness. I list. See how what I'm saying to myself? Yeah. You're saying it. I love it. Keep saying it. And then the go go going is not sustainable. We've known that for a long time, but it's also not lazy. List. So that's the new reframe. True. It's it's about rest and restoring. And then finally, don't take things personally. List. That's a great list, Cam. I'm so excited to start 2024 with all of these things working towards getting rid of them. Love it. List. Happy New Year. Happy New Year. Thanks for listening today. List. You can find us on Instagram at midlife.mommas For all of our other contact info, check out the show description below, and we will talk list. To you next week.