Breast Cancer Was This Woman's Gift. Really?

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month!
https://www.nationalbreastcancer.org/breast-cancer-awareness-month/

You've met Holly Bertone before in our episode about Gratitude, and she is with us again this week to talk about her personal journey through breast cancer. Holly is her usual, bubbly self and we are so grateful to HER for sharing her personal story.

Each year in the United States, about 240,000 cases of breast cancer are diagnosed.  Different people have different symptoms and some don't have symptoms at all. That's why breast cancer screenings are so important.

Join us for this touching and informative conversation with Holly Bertone about breast cancer.

00:02:46 Breast cancer at 38, initial dismissal. Takeaway: Trust your instincts, seek immediate attention.
00:07:14 Small tumor, lazy growth. Successful surgery. Uncertainty on treatment. Hair loss during chemotherapy. Surreal moment. Realization of support system. Motivation to overcome for her stepson.
00:11:32 Supportive ax, stepson finds solace in SpongeBob, lightness in cancer journey.
00:14:32 Ignorance of health during cancer treatment contributed.
00:18:51 Breast cancer became my defining gift.
00:21:12 Holly's life is awesome, with hardships.
00:28:22 Forced to slow down after rock bottom.
00:29:39 Stress response impacts decision-making. Take care.
00:34:51 Women's month raises awareness for health challenges.
00:36:36 Contact info in show description, talk later.

Connect with Holly Bertone, PMP, CNHP

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/holly.bertone/

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https://pinkfortitude.mykajabi.com/gratitude-quiz-pod

https://academy.pinkfortitude.com/blog

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Transcript

0:00

Welcome to October, ladies. We're so excited to have Holly Bertone back with us today. It is breast cancer awareness month as well as menopause awareness month, and we're so excited for Holly to share her story. Hi. I'm Cam, Holistic health coach, mom to 2 humans and 4 pets. Hi. I'm Amelia, laboratory scientists by day, and food scientists by night. Welcome to our show. Join us as we share our holistic approach to life after 50. You can expect real life stories with a dash of humor and a ton of truth. If it happens in midlife, we're going to talk about it. So hit that subscribe button and follow along. We're the Midlife Mommas. Holly is a transformational mindset coach and a motivational speaker, who helps you discover your comeback story, and today we're gonna hear all about hers. I can't wait. Hi, Holly. Hi, Cam. Hi, Emilia. I'm so excited to be back. Thanks for having me again. We are so honored for you to be here. So we would like to for you to tell us your story. Yeah. Absolutely. And I know we're, Obviously, this episode is on breast cancer, and I just wanna start by saying this is a very serious topic. But I like to Separate the seriousness of it from the reality and from I I come at this Kind of from an irreverent perspective, I use humor and I just it is such a heavy topic. And going through breast cancer myself, my dear warrior sisters who are currently going through breast cancer, who have gone through breast cancer, it's a lot. And I Honor that and I respect that. But when I speak about this, it is going to be very light. So I just want to put that out there to make sure that when you hear me talk about this from a light, From a lighter perspective that it's not from a place of, dismissing the the bigness of it. We really appreciate it. Yeah. We appreciate it, Holly. I mean, you were here before, talking about gratitude, and I got to be honest. It was probably my favorite episode with a guest, but one of my favorite episodes and we've got over a100. So, but the but the idea that you you bring some levity this topic, I think breast cancer has probably touched all of our lives in some way and if not specifically about disease processes, but if you can't laugh at yourself a little bit and have a little bit of fun with life. It it is generally heavy. So thank you for for helping us understand, what your story is through the lens of maybe a little bit of humor. Yeah. Thank you. And and and Obviously, I shared a lot about my story. I wanna be very specific and talk a little bit more about the breast cancer specifically Because what had happened was I was 38 years old. So I, you know, getting a mammogram was Not even on the radar. So I woke up 1 morning and it was over the weekend And I woke up and I just kinda rolled over, and I felt something on the right side of my breast. And it felt like a hard lump. I knew at that moment deep down that Inner voice that you listen to or you don't listen to, but that inner voice, and I knew At that moment, what it was. But logic kicked in. And I was like, well, I'm too young for this, and I'm quote, unquote Healthy because I was racing XTERRA triathlons and mountain bike racing and, you know, doing all the things. I actually wasn't healthy because of my lifestyle around that. Having a 6 pack of abs does not make one healthy. But, Yeah. So that Monday morning, I called my doctor. Fortunately, she got me in right away. And I'll I hear from so many women Whose doctors are like, you're too young, you're too young, you're too young, and they dismiss it, and it pushes it down the road for them to Not get a mammogram right away. So that's the very first takeaway is that if you feel something, if you sense something Is not right. So, Holly, look, I have 1 question about, like, the the progression. So the first thing is a mammogram. Is a bi The next thing, I mean, what what happens next? I think it all depends on your doctor on standard of care. For me, I went in and she just did an exam, and it was really interesting because, I was probably, I don't even know, a 110 pounds maybe, so very thin frame. And I don't even know how I found it because when I went to go back, like, it took a while, and even though I knew exactly where it was. My primary care doctor and every doctor that Tried to find it since then, it was hard for them to find. So it was really just by the grace of God that I woke up, rolled over, and found it. So, and this was also 13 years ago. So, you know, care may have have changed, but when I went through, it was the the exam was first. She She was like, yeah. Let's order a mammogram right away. That was second. I can't remember if I got an MRI or not, but then I did get a a biopsy at one point. So from start to finish, it was at least a month, if not more, of test before I got the phone call. So all of this was in progress. And when I got the phone call, it was on my 39th birthday, and I was on the metro train commuting home from in Washington DC. It was August, it was 90 degrees outside. The train was just packed. And I got the phone call from my doctor's office, and it was a doctor who I had never met before. And he said, I'm calling to give you your test results are back, and I'm calling to let you know that you have breast cancer. But don't worry, it's the good kind. Your next step is to go see a surgeon. Good luck. And that was the extent of the conversation. Takeaway number 2, that doctor sucked. Yeah. I know. That is not the way to share a breast cancer diagnosis. There is no good kind or yeah. There's no good kind of any kind of cancer. My So my tumor was 1 no. 44 centimeters. What's the size of your thumbnail? Is that 4 centimeters? I think. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I think of a centimeter as some almost like an inch, so I'm not sure. Yeah. I think it's about the size of of they said it was about the size of my thumbnail. So I don't I'm not good at So it's about the size of my thumbnail. So it was pretty small, and it was lazy. It was a slow growing tumor. 1st time in my entire life I was excited to be lazy about something. Reformed overachiever here. So That was good. That was a good prognosis, but it was not a good kind of cancer. There was no good kind of breast cancer. But what had happened was the, so I met with the surgeon. We ended up having surgery, And it was a a lump back to me. So they did all kinds of tests throughout the whole process to figure out standard of care. And every single test that came back, I was in the middle. You know, it wasn't like, oh, you should go do chemo or, oh, you shouldn't. Like, these Markers say you should do chemo, or these markers say you shouldn't do chemo, you know, whatever. Everything was right in the middle, and it was just a guessing game at that point. And had I know now what I knew then or had I know then what I know now, it was All I knew is that there was something inside of me that was trying to kill me, and I wanted it out And I wanted it out as fast as humanly possible. There was no logical thinking about anything. It was just get this out in Whatever means. I'm very young. I have a lot of years to live. I don't care how we do it. Let's do it. So we ended up Going through, ended up going through chemo and radiation as well. And I lost my hair on Thanksgiving day because, yeah, got diagnosed on my birthday. May as well lose my hair on Thanksgiving day. My, actually my ex my husband at the time, my ex husband now, and his stepson, we were up at his parents' house And all I had already shaved my head really short so that my hair is still really short, but when the hair just comes out. I mean, there is nothing nothing that can prepare you for that. And I was holding on really good until that moment, and I Had about 15 minutes. I called him up to the to the bedroom. I was just in tears at about 15 minutes. I was just crying, ugly cry, And I came down and my stepson at the time I think was 6 maybe. And, you know, grandma got out the the clippers And she's shaving my head. She, you know, sent them in outside. She's shaving my head in the kitchen and my stepson's running around and, You know, picking up my hair and laughing and having fun, and I was like, it is it was such a surreal moment of losing my hair. It was such a big piece of this is real. And him I mean, he was, like, 5 or 6 at the time. Like, he didn't know any better. And him running around and laughing because he just thought it was fun. And and I think that it just gave so much Just it made it so real that it wasn't just me going through this. It was everyone around me and realizing that I need to do everything that I can to get through this So that I can watch him grow up, so that I can be there for him and that's what I did. So Holly, in that during that thanksgiving, I just had so many thoughts and so many emotions while you were describing it. With The grandma helping you and being at a family function. Did you feel supported because they were there, or is there an element of aloneness because You were having to work through this and even though these people cared, they couldn't really understand. I mean, I think everything at that point is just so surreal. Yeah. Absolutely. I felt supported. You know, everyone was, You know, even my ax at the time, I mean, he could not have been any more supportive. So and, you know, going through treatment, my stepson, We would we would lay on the couch on the rough days especially during chemo, and he wouldn't he wanted to watch SpongeBob cartoons and He's like, stepmom, SpongeBob's gonna cure your cancer. It's gonna make you feel better, and it was just so sweet. And, you know, going into, you know, Doing the whole PTA mom thing and going into his classroom and and he was like, stepmom, wear the pink wig. You gotta wear the pink wig. And, you know, I would go in and, You know, and he was so proud. He's like stepmom has cancer, so she gets to wear a pink wig and the kids are like, that's so cool. Again, it's like 2nd grade. Like, You know, they don't know any better and it just it just brought so much lightness to going through something so big. That is so amazing, and I I can't I can't imagine what that might have been like for you and in that environment. I'm glad that it was a supportive feeling and that you were able to see the joy in these children and the innocence, I guess, even more than joy, the innocence, of what of what they saw because for them, they didn't, you know, maybe children are insulated intellectually around these sorts of things, but I'm really glad that you, were able to to witness that and have that kind of support. So was your was the chemo and radiation after your surgery? Right. It was surgery and then I did Four rounds of chemo and then, I think it was 32, 36 rounds of radiation. So And how long over the time frame? Like, from the time of, well, we know you were diagnosed in August, and you said the the surgery must have been soon because then you said you your hair fell out in November. Right? Yeah. So the surgery was in, October. Okay. And so how started chemo. Yeah. And then when were the when How long before the last radiation treatment or the last chemo? Like, how long of a time span are we talking about? From start to finish, let's see. I felt the lump. I think it was July that I felt the lump, and we ended everything in March. So Okay. Think about 9 months or so. Okay. Did it feel kind of like you said it was surreal, but did it feel like the months were dragging? Like, Is this ever gonna be over, or was it more like all you could think about is, like, the next day and getting through whatever that day was? It was literally from 1 treatment to the next. So from 1 chemo to the next. Like, get your labs back. Go to the next one. Get your labs back. Go to the next one, And, I mean, it was just kinda counting everything down. Wow. Do you have any regrets about your breast cancer treatment? I do now, but I don't but the the thing is I like to look at life I don't like to look at life from a place of regrets because I like to say that these are lessons that I got to learn. But, yes, number 1 is that I didn't understand Health while I was going through treatment. So so 2 things around that. Number 1 is that I had really weird cravings, and the chemo pushed me into chemical menopause at 39. Actually, in October, which is also menopause month, so it's I got the breast cancer and the menopause all in the same month. We can talk about that too if you want, but, but, yeah, the I I I did not understand health and I had all of these really weird cravings. So I craved or right of French fries and Dairy Queen blizzards. Alright. 2 things that have 0 nutritional value whatsoever, and that's what I ate during chemo. Whereas, you know, nowadays, I would know if someone was going through chemo to make sure that, you know, they A a you know, and and and I don't know the specifics, but an To put nutrients back into your body after losing everything from chemo. So, yeah, that was one thing I had no concept of How to eat healthy like that. And then number 2 was that I didn't stop. I kept going. From my own mental health perspective, I needed life to be normal. Like, I needed to I was a chief of staff at one of those Three letter federal government agencies they make TV shows about. Fortunately, they were super accommodating at the time. So, you know, I would Go into work and drive myself to treatment and then, you know, go pick up my stepson from school and drive home. Like, that was a normal day for me. Okay. There's something really wrong with that. Right? Like, I should have just gone to treatment, and that was it. I should not have gone to work. I should have someone else pick him up. I you know, like, all of these things going back, and I was like, I need to have life as normal as humanly possible. So that's what I did. And, you know, I go in on the weekends or, you know, if I was tired during treatment, I close the door, take a nap, like, all these things. Like, No. Like, you're supposed to take care of yourself when you're going through something like that, but I didn't. I didn't stop. I was such an overachiever. I just pushed and I pushed and I pushed and I pushed. And what had happened was that after treatment ended, I never Got healthy again. I, it took about a year, but I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's thyroiditis, which is an autoimmune condition. So and I don't know if it was brewing before cancer or if chemo kind of brought it to the surface, but I definitely did not take care of myself during treatment. And yet you were an extreme exerciser, and you were checking all those boxes. Susan. So Oh, yeah. That yeah. Yeah. We have that on On the days that so they gave you, what's the what's the, the drug that makes you, like, really high? They don't know. Anyway but it was. So they gave it to me to go through the chemo, dex Methodexoline. I don't know. Anyway, it doesn't matter. But they gave it to me. It's like a steroid and but you would literally feel like you're just high, but they give it to you during at least back then they did, During chemo. So I would go to the gym, you know, and run 3 miles at Super high speeds, you know, and I'd have my my, you know, my my headset on and, you know, be singing and, You know, just crazy things like that. Like, no. You don't not like, you're supposed to exercise, but you don't have to go to that extreme. Mhmm. Mhmm. On when you were on our show before, you mentioned that gift cans or breast cancer was a gift to you. Can you explain that a little bit? Yeah. So I was super snarky, sarcastic, snarktastic, and having been diagnosed with breast cancer on my birthday, I would always joke. I'd say, Yeah. Some girls get flowers or some girls that get earrings. And my my gift was breast cancer, and I would joke about it and I would joke about it sarcastically. But the thing was Every time you know, because cancer is a big thing, so everyone, you know, has to know about it. And every time I told my story over and over and over again, I kept saying Breast cancer was my gift. Breast cancer was my gift. Breast cancer was my gift. And even though it was sarcastic, my cells Listen. My body listened to that, and at one point, it actually believed it. And it was about a month into treatment, And I felt this I don't even know how to explain it. It was just this wave of peace that fell over me, and it was like God saying, This is gonna be okay that this is your gift. And that's when I realized, like, okay. I have no clue what this means. No clue what this means. This is my gift. So I just kinda put a pin in that. Again, I Mhmm. Know. I just wanted to survive. I just wanted to get through everything. And now I understand that this was a way for me to Rearrange the priorities in my life. This is a time for me to understand that I am supposed to slow down, that I am supposed to revisit What real health really needs that I am supposed to reevaluate the priorities in my life. There's a There's a saying that's that goes around in the cancer circles that says cancer shouldn't define you. And and I understand what they mean, But I actually disagree with that because cancer did define me, and I'm glad it did because, you know, I now get to Have this, you know, this platform and a business and a podcast and, you know, to to be invited to speak and To be able to share this message that you can come back from your adversity. So, you know, in the in the long run, yeah, absolutely, it was a gift. It's so awesome that you can view your life that way, Holly. I'm in awe, and I mean, I even as you were talking about running on the treadmill, that resonates with me because I could totally see myself doing that, and I still have moments, and I've not gone through adversity to that level, but Certainly, there have been hard things, and I don't wanna sidetrack this conversation, but, I started a new job and, Less than a month later, my dad got diagnosed with leukemia, and the whole time he was in the hospital and through all of that, I worked. I didn't know there was a voice, and maybe there wasn't. I don't really know, but it it was a distraction as I was processing what I I was feeling this wasn't physical pain for me or physical hardship other than the hardship of going to work and then going to the hospital and then sleeping. But, you know, difficulties do teach us something about ourselves a lot of the times, whether it's a diagnosis of our own or helping someone else, and in my case, helping my dad die. He and my mom were not married at the time of his passing, and he wasn't married to anyone else. And I'm an only child, so that was it. And so it was it was hard. And so I know, you know, I know Cam and I have both used the phrase and I've seen it so many times, pick your hard. But there's something to be said for what what resilience and perseverance looks like. But what's amazing about you, Holly, is through this lens gratitude, and that's just for me, it's very humbling and comforting at the same time. So thank you for sharing all of that. But I also wanted to ask, you know, you have a very specific story, but how might that mirror What other people tend, you know, go through as far as hardship and and learning? Yeah. So Breast cancer and I should say traditional breast cancer treatment. It's not true for everyone, obviously, but traditional breast cancer treatment. You lose your hair, your breasts, and your fertility, and that is what traditionally defines us as a woman. And going through that, and I was actually engaged at the time trying to Be a sexy fiance and being bald and lopsided and, You know, going through menopause and realizing that I need to redefine What is my femininity? What who I am as a woman? And and I think that as women, we define ourselves by the external. We define ourselves by our jobs. We define ourselves as a wife. We define ourselves as a mom. We define ourselves as a daughter, as a sister, As a member of a church, as a neighbor, as, you know, all of these things as as an athlete, And we define ourselves by these external factors. But what really matters is who you are inside. And looking at the fact that, you know, I didn't have any hair, but, You know, I use the the the brains in my head to create humor to help me cope through the situation And to help those around me cope with the situation. You know, I didn't have, my fertility anymore, but I was Raising a child who was not biologically mine, and, you know, I got to be a mom in in that respect. And, you know, I was a little I called it my lucky fin. I was a little lopsided, you know, like Finding Nemo. Yeah. You know, but I was like, I have a heart that can love. And being able to just really redefine what, Where our value comes from and who we are in realizing that it is the internal. It's not the external. We often talk about the midlife awakening on this podcast and your midlife awakening was a little earlier than midlife. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But that's what it is. Like, rediscovering who you are and defining redefining who you are and what really matters to you. Thank you for sharing your story. Yeah. Absolutely. And I I'm still trying to figure that name of that jar. It's like dexamethasone or something. I don't know. It doesn't matter, but That's crazy you're still exercising while you're doing the treatment. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm not surprised at all. I think we all have have had moments where We would've we did do something that probably was over the edge. And you said, to reexamine and I know You don't look you don't wanna look back or anything, but when you were redefining yourself and who you were, How did you feel about who Holly was before cancer versus who Holly is after cancer? Wow. That's a good question. You know, I think and especially in our twenties thirties, we kinda think we're invincible. Right? Mhmm. Like, You know, oh, I'm never gonna get sick and, you know, I you know, my insurance sucked. Mhmm. You know, because I was like, well, I'm never gonna get sick. And, you know, being an Xterra racer and mountain bike competitive mountain bike racer and, You know, being a a chief of staff at a top government agency and, you know, all of these things and, you know, really looking at that level of, you know, the the success, but then kind of redefining that from the perspective of of slowing down. Like, I really needed to slow down, and that was so important to me. And it took me a while to do that. I mean, that was actually my body forced me to do it. Do you ever still feel tempted to dip your toe back into that world? Do Do you ever catch yourself? I know I do. Yes and no. There are days at work that I go a little too much, but I check myself very quickly. Mhmm. And I give myself that rest. I'll just I shut everything down. I shut my phone off. I'll put on some music or put on some meditation, and I'll set it a puzzle. I I love doing puzzles. I just sit at my puzzle table and put a puzzle together and just Quiet everything. What is that trigger? What do you how do you know that you're going there and you're like, nope. Stop. What is it? After all of those years of debilitating chronic fatigue, I can tell when my energy starts to dip even just a little bit. Mhmm. So I was like, it's time to it's time to take a step back. It's time to take the foot off the gas and just just coast a little bit. That's very helpful. Yeah. Mine is I feel busy behind my eyes, and when that happens Oh, wow. No. I just feel busy. My brain's going a 1000000 miles An hour. You know, and it was interesting. You're you're you were talking about, like, the go go go. I remember there was one time in actually, 2 times. So there was one time in Walmart, and I'm pushing the grocery cart, and I literally could not and even my my, you know, exit my ex was like, I will go to the store. Just tell me what to get. Give me a list. And I was like, no. No. No. I can do it myself. You know? And I am literally I am in so much pain. I was bent over The grocery cart at Walmart trying to get groceries. I was like, this is, like, this is not I was supposed to like, proving something to someone. Like, this is not a good thing. And, You know, and I remember one time coming out of the hospital and, like, running down the hallway of the hospital and almost knocking this elderly woman over, you No. Because I'm trying to run to get to the car, to get to the school, to get to the you know, to do all the things after treatment. And I was like, I don't have time for this. You know? But, you know, all of these things are like, Holly, slow down. Slow down. But yeah. It Yeah. I had to hit rock bottom 3 times before I was actually forced to slow down. Oh. And so, you know, kinda rounding back to our original topic of breast cancer. Well, do you have any advice for someone who is currently battling a breast cancer diagnosis? Yeah. I think the a couple things. When when those big Life events happen, you know, whether it's it's cancer or something else. Our body immediately goes into the stress response. The we we go into the the sympathetic stress response, the the fight, flight, or freeze. Our amygdala hijacks our brain, And we do not have as clear of a mind to make good decisions. So the first thing, which I know sounds kinda weird, but the first thing I like to say is Don't make any decisions unless you absolutely have to. And I think so often with cancer treatment, there's so much fear either Internally or internally, you know, you hear that word and you get scared to death and the doctors don't help. But if You have a chance to stop, to research, to get different opinions, to evaluate, and to really Sit in the quiet and say, what does my body need to get through this? And I think that that is probably my my number one piece of advice is to not make any quick decisions to try to calm your mind before making those decisions, making them from a rational perspective versus kind of that emotional and and fear perspective. And then number 2 is, you know, don't do what I did. You know, take care of your body. Let people help you. People wanna help you, and I think as women, we're used to being the ones that are doing for others, and it's It's difficult for us to accept that help and, you know, tell people what you need and let them help you And, you know, just really take care of your body. Your body is going through a lot regardless of whether you go through traditional treatment Or different kind of treatment or whatever, but your body is going through a lot, and this is the time more than ever to take care of your body and To to rest and to feed it good healthy food and to drink lots of water to flush out all the toxins. And, like I said, just to really be able to be in that place where you can slow down and take care of your entire body, mind, body, spirit. Great advice. Thank you so much. I know, at our age in midlife, many people receive, challenging diagnoses whether it's breast cancer or another type of cancer or an autoimmune disease or Even if you are now have problems with your thyroid or whatever, heck, menopause itself can be feel like a diagnosis even though we know that we're gonna Approach that at some point or at least we we hope we do. The alternative sucks. So, there are all sorts of challenges. So, You know, I would say almost this advice is great for anything new and different. You know, no matter what that challenge is in life to to slow down and take time, and not make any big decisions because that's I I see I could feel exactly what you're saying about fear and that would be me because I'm a doer, like, I'm all about the action. And so to say, let's hold off, I really really appreciate that wisdom, because that would never enter my mind to, like, take a step back. I'd be like, alright. Let's do it all. Let's do whatever it takes. So so thank you for that. Alright. Well, we did say it was also, menopause month. I'm not sure if there's anything you want to share about menopause before we wrap up, Polly, especially since you went through it super early. Yeah. Yeah. So well, the funniest thing was that, chemo kicked me into menopause right away. So, I mean, literally after the 1st treatment, I did not have a a a period after that. So I was in chemical menopause since October of, What? 2010? So when I was 39. And the craziest thing was that my oncologist was like, oh, don't worry. You're so young. It's gonna come back. And, you know, I was like, oh, no. I I think I said a few ex I was like, oh, no. I was like, going through menopause once It's bad enough. I am not going through this again. Yeah. And I was like, oh, it is not coming back, and it did not. So I think I had, like, 1 or 2 spotting in 13 years, but that was like, it is not coming back, and I'm not going through menopause again. But, yeah, I mean, it was, You know, like sticking my head in the freezer and, you know, I remember going into Home Depot in in the in in February and literally stripping down to I wear a A tank top because, you know, ever since I haven't worn bras since. So I wear a tank top. Like, I literally remember stripping down in in the middle of February just down to my tank top in the Home Depot. What is wrong with you? We can relate to those things. Of course. Yeah. We were I was at work and and the girls would play the, how many times is Holly gonna put her sweater on and off, you know, in an hour or in the meeting or it was just it was just like it was like a party game, you know, and then the walking farts. I mean, I don't I don't know if that was I don't think that was menopause. I think that was just chemo in my GI tract, but, you know, that that added to the fun just, you know, walking and not having any control over my bowels. That's like rat a tat a tat. Oh my gosh. That that's bound to be, you know, an interesting existence and and somewhat humbling just to be like, alright. This is me. This is this is where I am at the moment. So October is an exciting month for women, and I hope all of our listeners are Paying attention and giving some thought to what this means for them, whether it's a challenging diagnosis and hug your sisters, friends, aunts, whoever. My college roommate, her mother died of ovarian cancer, and I know that's not what we're discussing, but her her life's work has been raising money for ovarian cancer awareness. I'm not sure what month that is, but just, you know, there are diagnoses that are very unique to women, including menopause. So hug your hug hug someone today or tomorrow and let them know that you're thinking about them because it is serious, but we can also have a little fun and definitely make each other laugh. And Holly, where's the best place to reach you? Oh, sure. So the best place after you're listening to this episode is head on over to the Gratitude Builds Fortitude podcast and just start at the top And pick your favorite episode and jump there. And I'm also on Instagram at holly.bertone. So if you wanna say hello, I do, I I run my own Instagram. I don't outsource that. So if you wanna send me a DM, I will respond. Excellent. Thank Thank you. It's been a pleasure talking with you again today. You you're just always a bright spot on the midlife mommas, and we're so so, privileged and pleased to know you. Thanks so much for having me. Thanks for listening today. You can find us on Instagram@midlife.mommas. For all of our other contact info, check out the show description below, and we will Talk to you next week.