Rest vs. Sleep: What's the Difference?

We know that we need to pay closer attention to rest and sleep in midlife, but what is the difference between rest and sleep? I've found that even when I'm getting enough   
sleep, I may not be getting enough rest.  For me that manifests in increased crankiness and a lesser ability to cope with day-to-day stresses. For you, this may look differently.

Join Cam and I as we unpack the difference between these 2 critical factors in optimal health.
 
00:00:00 Menopause halted fitness plan, join free challenge.
00:04:54 Signs of fatigue, need for rest.
00:09:22 Ideal bedtime for optimal deep sleep importance.
00:13:06 Sleep sounds on Alexa help me relax.
00:13:52 Magnesium blend taken at night for sleep.
00:19:38 Various types of rest can be beneficial, such as social and creative rest. Resting in one area while engaging in another is an active state. It's important to rest from all things sometimes. Realizing this has been a significant learning experience.
00:22:42 Travel challenge: food, colleagues, meditation critical.
00:24:30 Connect with nature to stay present.
00:27:45 Rest & sleep conversation: Physical rest in workouts. Rest more in midlife.

Mentioned in this episode:
Unleash Your Creative Soul Podcast with Lindsay Jani
Transform your mindset & energy with these simple questions for a profound impact

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Amelia

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Transcript

0:00

When menopause hit, my go to fitness plan came to a screeching halt. Hey. It's Cam. And if you're experiencing slow recovery, endless exhaustion, and no results. Despite exercising, I have a free 5 day menopause fitness challenge designed for you. September 18th through 22nd. The right kind of strength training is the best way to increase your energy and see the results from your efforts. So over 5 days, you'll do strength and core workouts plus you'll learn all about your midlife metabolism. So you know what to do and when without staying stuck frustrated or exhausted. So join me and other midlife women inside this free challenge and embrace this chapter with strength and confidence. Head to camoiler.com/fitness or visit the show notes to sign up. Amelia, I know you've been traveling a bunch. Are you feeling okay? I hope you get some good rest when you get home. Hi. I'm Cam, holistic health coach, mom, the 2 humans, and 4 pet. Hi. I'm Amelia, laboratory scientists by day, and food scientists by night. Welcome to our show. Join us as we share our holistic approach to life after 50. You can expect real life stories with a dash of humor and a ton of truth. If it happens in midlife, we're going to talk about it. So hit that subscribe button and follow along. We're the midlife mommas, Hey, Cam. I have been traveling a bunch. I went to see my kids a few weeks ago. I just got home from a business trip, and good rest is important. But what exactly do people mean when they say get some good rest? I know. What is that? Cause really, are you resting? Are you sleeping? What's the difference? Exactly. So everybody, we're super excited to delve into one half of this topic that we talk about all the time, which is sleep, but the other half is rest. And this is kinda born out of Cam and I both having, contracted maybe a little respiratory thing or allergies going on in me traveling. So we wanna dive into what is rest versus what is sleep. Do you consider them separate things? Let's start there. Absolutely. I do, Cam. I have to admit that sometimes I don't behave like I consider them separate because resting in other words, actively not doing, and I know that's a double negative and improper, but you get the idea. That's harder for me. Sleep, I can get my head around because I understand what that is. But I do think they actually are different things. Yeah. When you're resting, do you feel like you're lazy and your to do list is like screaming at you in the corner? Is that how you feel? 100%. That's not exactly how I feel. How about you? Yeah. I would 100% agree with that. So I've been under the weather. I'm alive today. I'm feeling amazing. I'm still not a 100% but compared to, like, 2 days ago, I'll take it. And today, now that I have and I was ready to go. Like, I wiped down the whole kitchen. I swept the floor. I swept the steps. I did some laundry. All those things that I was not doing when I was out of commission that I like to keep up with, I kinda caught up. Yeah. Yeah. That and that's really good that you've you're feeling better, but let's set a little bit of framework for our conversation. The first thing I'd like dimension, which we've we reiterate over and over, is that we do need more recovery time in midlife, and that throws in a whole another term recovery. Sometimes we use rest and recovery in similar manners, but we talk about things like time cushioning and things like that. So recovering from one task to the other takes a little bit more time. We know that multitasking is not a badge of honor. So more recovery time is necessary in midlife than maybe we thought it was 20 years ago. 100%. And when it comes to size. We know that is also true that your Monday, Wednesday, Friday schedule may be keeping you stuck and not achieving your goals that you're working on. So maybe try Monday, Thursday. Giving yourself 2 days of rest, away from strength training, for example, may also help. That's another example of where we need more recovery. Right. Exactly. And, you know, for me, Cam, I have to watch for signs of fatigue because this sneaks up on me when I don't even realize that I'm tired. And for me, this looks like my temper gets short. I begin everything and everyone gets on my very last word I'm easily frustrated. I don't cope with day to day change. In other words, a shifting schedule or a canceled appointment or whatever. Frustrates me more. So those for me are signs of fatigue that I haven't recovered enough or need some rest. I I'm the we are the same because I agree all of those things. It's kinda like you're gripping instead of relaxing. What what's your good quote about that? Gripping instead of -- Oh. -- oh, anyway. Embrace instead of bracing. And so so one of the times for me that I need more rest is the the bracing And a lot of times, it comes just before illness. If I've pushed myself to the limit, I will push through it. And in fact, I have to be honest on this business trip. I've I've actually taken a class, a business class that my boss has recommended, and I was working on some homework, and there was just the tiny little ten question quiz, and I had a really hard time, Cam. I had a hard time focusing on finding the answer, like, really thinking about what it was asking and, you know, a lot of these questions are like, what is not true about these set of statements? And those are always confusing for me. But I got super frustrated. And so I was like, you know what? This is a sign of something because this isn't my normal ordered thinking. So, you know, that was another another sign of fatigue there. Yeah. I noticed when I overschedule myself, that kind feeling too. Like, why did you do this to yourself? You know, you need more space between events or pushing things or, group things together, like things together. Yeah. I was snippy this morning, but I'm feeling better now. Good. Good. So let's kind of unpack rest versus sleep. And I'm gonna start with the easy one which is sleep. And when I started kind of really looking into the differences between rest and sleep, one of the biggest things that I found is that sleep is passive, meaning we are literally doing nothing, thinking about nothing, but there's ways to enhance sleep. And there's all kinds of types of sleep. And I know that you measure your sleep. So why don't you tell us a little bit about these patterns? Yeah. So we have 3 stages of sleep. We have light sleep, deep sleep, and REM sleep, and then awake because that happens too overnight. And so we cycle through these cycles about every 90 minutes. And so the deep sleep occurs in the first half of your sleep, and then most of the REM happens in the second half of your night. And so when you're cycling through that and you hit hit the light level, the light sleep level, that's when you can easily wake up and, you know, that kind of stinks. So it might be light. It could be noise. It could be your brain. Believe it or not. Like, not eating enough, not eating enough carbs specifically could wake you up. There's all kind hormonal things. All kinds of things can wake you up when you're in that light sleep. But when you're in deep sleeper REM, you're probably pretty good to go. Outstanding. And, tell us about the way you monitor your sleep. Yeah. So I wear a ring, because I don't like watches. There are watches that do the same thing. There's a loop and a Fitbit. I know in Apple, but I think you have to charge Apple overnight. So I don't know about that one. And I wear it and it tracks all kinds of things. It tracks readiness for the next day, which I struggled with through my 40. So now I know. I always guess, and then I look at my actual score. It's sync to my phone. I'm like, yeah. I knew that. Actually, the night I was at my worst in this illness, I was up almost 4 hours that night. Wow. My my graph was crazy. I was awake. I was cycling through, and I just kept waking up. I couldn't get comfortable. It was absolutely crazy, but I was up for, like, 3 hours 45 minutes overnight, which is not good. No. It's not good at all. No. Uh-uh. Yeah. So there's lots of ways to monitor sleep. It's just being an experiment of 1. And, you know, I've shared before, like, I exercise late once with my friend because she encouraged me to go on this trail run, which I was not condition to do. And it was, like, 7 o'clock at night. And, like, I my sleep was trash that night because exercising late is one of my triggers. Alcohol is a trigger. Eating late is a trigger. And we know that scientifically, but I also know that personally because I've seen the data on my on my score the next day. So So very good advice. So if you're a data nerd or really struggle with, making changes in behavior you're based on data or based on assumptions, I should say. This would be a great investment, especially in midlife where we know we already have troubles with sleep. As a general rule, not everybody does, but I would I think we had this conversation, Cam, when we were talking about some things to invest in your health then. You know, fairly easy. One of the things you were really strongly recommending was the r ring, and I think it's a great idea, especially for those people that are like, I just I'm not sure I really need to understand and it gives you all that data. Yeah. And one thing I wanna point out about the deep sleep, which I've learned through the aura ring for sure. My deep sleep, for me, personally, I need to go to bed between

9: 9:31

10 PM in order to get my optimal deep sleep. And deep sleep is when your brain like, cleans itself out. That's when your body heals and your brain detoxes and all these amazing things happen when you get deep sleep. If I personally mess up and stay up too late because I'm trying to stay up and watch TV with my husband or whatever and I miss my window of going to bed, my deep sleep suffers. And that means a lot of things. That means I'm not getting my deep sleep. My body's not healing. I'm not detoxing, and that's not a way to live. I never knew that. Like, that's surprising to me. I I knew going to bed about the same time and waking up about the same time helps your body's rhythm. But I can see the data when it comes to deep sleep if I don't follow that guideline. Very cool. You've learned so much about yourself. And in fact, I've learned some things about myself too as far as sleep patterns. If I go to bed naturally and my favorite time to go to bed is in the 9 you know, probably a little earlier to than you

maybe between 8:39: 10:31

30. So now that the days are shorter, I'm loving it. And I will naturally wake up in about 8 hours.

My wake up time is usually between 5:36: 10:39

30 in the morning. So, you know, It's very much the same as far as, like, patterns. But I do know some people really believe that they need less sleep. And I know, a friend of mine has told me that she, her normal sleep, optimally, is 9 hours. So is different sleep amounts as far as your research goes normal that some people need more and some people need less? Yeah. Like, 7 to 9 hours is what's popped into my mind. So, yeah, so you fit into there. If I get under 7 and I'm sick something, Not good. Yeah. Yeah. I love that you go to bed and wake up with a natural light. Like, that's my ideal day. When there were no alarms and no one's having to get up and go to the office or whatever.

That's my perfect. When the alarm goes up at 5 or 5: 11:31

30, that's just I just need a little bit more -- Yeah. -- to get out of that sage of sleep, and then I'm good. Anyway, alarms mess that up. And they do. And you know what? Most weekdays. I'd leave I get up first, but the alarm is on my husband's side of the bed. He might be worried just shut it off and go back to sleep. But, a lot of times, what happens is he'll say, what time do you want me to set the clock and very rarely do I need it? I would say 1 day a week, I'll actually hear the alarm to get up. Most other days, I get up naturally. That's awesome. I love that. That's like a good day when your body just is doing what it's supposed to do. I love it. And honestly, I'm able to do that because I know how long I need to sleep, and I'm basically back into the bedtime. Yeah. So it's just kind of the way I've structured sleep, and I'm able to do that because you know, I try not to get wrapped up into any commitments specifically and less, you know, So with with anything like television where I'm gonna be up late. Yeah. That's where I get hooked in. So good job. Yeah. That's where I get looped in. Yeah. Sorry. You know, there are sometimes, though, for whatever reason that we might need some sort of aid for sleep. I mean, whether it's been a busy day or an anxious day or There could be a variety of things. So there are sleep aids that we can use. Is there anything that you use either regularly or occasionally for sleep Yeah. I use sleep sounds on our, our Alexa every single day. That's part of it. It's babblingbrook. It's very soothing. It's rushing water. It sounds amazing. So that's something I really like, especially if you have a person that makes extra aeronoids. Yes. Yes. Sleeves in your same bed. It just kinda you know, gets you over that hump when you're going through that light sleep cycle. It just really helps me. So I use melatonin. I'm not currently using it as religiously as I was. It came back really high on my Dutch test, so I'm backing off a little bit. But you can also use, like, essential oils like lavender, think, you know, that's another way to get your body ready. It's really about getting ready at your night routine. Like, what is your key for bed routine? What are what are some of your things? How do you get ready? So my, the number one thing I do is I do take a magnesium blend At night, it's actually I dissolve it in water. The brand is HelloNet. It has magnesium glycine. It has GABA. It has l theanine. And I think got lemon balm. And I take that religiously every single night, about 30 minutes before bed. I'm a huge fan of magnesium in general, but that specific compound, the magnesium glis glycinate is very good. And I also have some, little chewable things that I get at the whole food store when I travel because sleeping in a strange bed, it can be difficult. And that has, I think, 3 milligrams of melatonin, passionflower, chamomile, that may have lemon balm in it too, Cam. But I don't use those regularly, but I take them with me. They're they're super easy to travel with. And I just have it in my tollatory kit in case I'm like, alright. I really need to and you know what, Cam? When I travel, a lot of times it's to a different time zone, So I went to the central time zone this last week, and that 1 hour of difference can can wreak havoc. So I definitely use my little chewy things with the melatonin and all the other good herbs in it. I love that. We use also a Tri Mag, which is at the point of 3 different Magnesiums that about 30 minutes before sleep. You dissolve it in water. So there are great products out there that will support you. Magnesium is definitely I take Magnesium during the day and then May 2 at night. The other thing that's a sleep aid, it's, I take bio identical progesterone. Yeah, and that really, like, gets you ready for bed too. Absolutely. I mean, and we've done whole episodes on sleep. So this is just kind of a recap, kind of a don't forget that this is one of the pillars of your health. But with that said, let's just kinda talk a little bit about what is different about rest. And what's really cool when we consider the word rest, it can actually be active or passive. And so when I used to coach triathletes, we would call a rest day, a day, or a recovery. Some people prefer the word recovery It was a day where we didn't do a physical workout, or we did what we sometimes we would call it active recovery where it would be a a a super easy pleasurable bike ride or a walk. But with rest, we can talk about it in terms of physical, mental, creative, or social. So there's different types of rest. Yeah. I'm a big fan of those, those active rest days. Like, that's, I mean, I'm not in the gym. I'm not lifting weights. I'm not doing cardio. I'm just moving my body. Yeah. I love that kind of thing. It's so good. It is good. And for me, my job isn't physical at all. It's purely mental. So mental rest is important. So, As I told you before, we hit record, I flew on Friday, and it was a little bit of a difficult plane ride, not not the least of which was some turbulence, but I didn't get back into my home city until, like, 6 PM And even though I still needed to catch up on a few work items that had built up while I was away, Saturday for me was complete mental rest. I said, you know what? Regardless of these things that need to be done, I need a day where I'm not thinking about this. Because it doesn't help my creative process. It doesn't help me do a good job if I keep pushing through when I'm mentally tired. I agree. And that's when I get irritable and my fuse is short and all the things. And your creative ideas just dry up. I agree with you a 100%. It's true. And when you're when your job, as yours in mind, does realize at least a small part on creativity, and I would venture to say that it doesn't really matter what your job, your vocation is. There's a certain amount of creativity involved. And when you push that all time sometimes it can create to it can lead to lack of creative ideas like you feel like you've got a mental block and so given yourself permission to step away from that, especially if you're like you can, you're you're entire inner sizes you. And so you have to, like, be creative about how you market it, how you create it, and all the things. So if you're pushing it all the time, it might I can see where that could be stressful. Yeah. My phone I work on my phone, and sometimes I don't answer personal messages. As efficiently as I used to. And I'm like, I I know that's I see myself not responding. It's because I'm always on my phone. And so it's weird. We've talked about, like, how do you separate work and life? And I don't know. It blends sometimes. Sometimes I just take a break. Yeah. Sometimes it has to. And here's the thing. I mean, my children have recently set me up with Snapchat. I literally didn't do this until, like, a month ago. And I I do. It's fun. It's funny, but, like, on my work trip, they would these pings and dings would come in. And I'm like, I can't address that right now. Like, I I'm just ignoring them. And I would the same if it were texting, but That kinda leads to another kind of rest, social rest. If you have a job or a vocation or you're super active socially, you may need to take a break from that. And that's okay. That's, you know, especially if you're an introverted personality, you need some rest and recharge time for you because introverted people are exhausted social interaction that that's overwhelming to them. Yeah. So I would consider myself an introvert, and I work from home, and I'm home alone a lot. And so I need for my break, I need to go out and be around people to hear your opposite, but it's just because of the situation and the season of life I'm in right now. But, yeah, So and that's that's the thing is these types of rest can be synergistic. My example is social engagement with your friends may promote mental or creative rest from your work. So with all of these types of rest, you can be in an active rest state in one area of your life and an engagement period in another area. So it's not like, you know, it's not like sleep where it's passive even you've turned all brain activity off. It's just that you're resting from one thing and not another, but I think we need rest from all things sometimes. You know what I mean? Like like creative rest, social rest, whatever. And I I don't think I realized that cam probably until maybe 3 or 4 years ago where I was like, I'm just pushing myself to the limit too much because it was that time of my life where I didn't wanna say no to anybody or anything. So, you know, regardless of how heavy my work week was, somebody calls and wants to do something socially. Absolutely. I'm I'm there. And now I'm like, if it's super busy at work and I just don't have the the bandwidth. I'm like, I really appreciate it, you guys. I'd love to see you, but I'm just this is not a good week for me, and that's been a big learning experience. I think you have very strong boundaries, and you do in such a loving way. So it's a good thing. Yeah. That's how I see it. Well, and I appreciate that I feel like it's learned. And and through that learning process, Cam, there was a little bit of guilt associated and trying to really unpack my feelings of what am I afraid of here? Am I afraid that if I decline this invitation that I won't get asked again and realizing that silly, but, you know, your mind plays funny tricks on you. You really do have to take those thoughts to court. Yeah. I I listened to a great podcast last week. I will like to link it. Her name's Lindsey. It's someone I know from my business coaching, but she was feeling heavy in her body, and she wanted to go out for a run. And then she was go running She was just really having a hard time to get going, and she started asking herself questions. And I believe and she believes we have the same mentor, like, the quality of your life is determined by the quality of your questions. And when you ask yourself a question, you're going to get an answer. So I love that you did that about what is it? Why do I feel like I have to say yes to these social obligations or to whatever you're, you know, feeling heavy about and asking yourself those questions, you kinda get to the bottom of it, and your body has to answer. So, anyway -- I totally agree. And everybody's questions and answers are gonna be different, and that's okay. And I had to learn that as well. But just talking about asking yourself these questions, questions, when you're trying to determine what your needs are, especially with re re excuse me, with respect to rest there are some things that we can do that help us listen to our mind, body, and spirit. Can you think of some things you use? I mean, eating healthy, alive food, because I feel like poo, if I eat food that can be alive longer than I can, like a monster. In fact, you know, food that rots, in general makes me feel alive. How about you? Same same. I totally agree. And in fact, this travel, because, you know, when you travel, it it is a challenge. And this hotel where we stay where I stayed at in this last trip was in an industrial complex. So I was really at the mercy of my colleagues, if we went somewhere or the hotel food, and it was a real challenge. So when I got home, the first thing, I was like, we need south. Like, we need fresh vegetables in our life. And it might have been psychosomatic. Like, I didn't feel bad in my belly, but I just knew that I hadn't been feeding my body what it really needed for 3 days. So I agree with you. Another thing for me is one of my minimums, Cam, is a meditation and devotional time first thing in the morning. And when I travel, I maintain this pattern. So I do have time. Usually, I do, have a cup of coffee with it and water, but it's 30 to 45 minutes every day without I won't say without fail, but every day that I can, that I spend time, and then sometimes it's just self reflection of How do I feel today? How did I sleep? What can I do to improve the way I feel or capitalize on the fact that I feel great? But That meditation time in the early morning for me is critical. I love it because you're really asking yourself questions because I truly believe that the answers within us And so many times, we just, like, ignore it and push through, or we, rely on an outside source -- Yeah. -- like some authority, quote, unquote authority. Yeah. So I love that. It's very self reflective. Very good. I'm working on that that I've not mastered that. It's on my list. I use Insight timer most mornings. Versus jumping in my phone and getting an Instagram or answering emails. Like, so I'm working on that practice. I'm not there yet. You'll you'll get there. And the other time I really the other thing that really helps me be in tune with my mind, body, and spirit is spending time in nature. A lot of time for me, this looks like walking. But sometimes it's just sitting on my porch. And sometimes, you know, I've really started to pay attention to all five senses when I can. You know, what am I hearing if it's bird song or, you know, in when I was traveling, even in a hotel, I can hear outside noises. And sometimes that's urban noises. Sometimes it's traffic, but really tuning into this present moment. What do I feel? What do I smell? You know, it it's really important to stay present in that moment. It's better when it's in nature. It's not quite as much fun when you're in a hotel room, but just being an intent to be present and feel the feels and experience the senses in that moment. I love that. One of my practices is my my office is on our lower level of our house, and there's no, like, natural daylight. So I tend to work in our family room, which is isn't really an office, but there's a ton of daylight. And right outside is the deck. And when I need a break, I go sit in the sun on my deck and just hang out. And usually the dogs and the cats come out there with me, and we just hang out. That's how, like, I recharge. I feel like I'm recharging my solar batteries when out there. I totally believe that you are. And, I mean, while I tend to believe everyone could benefit from time outside, I do have friends who are not tremendously enamored with the outdoors if it involves anything like sweating or dirt or things like that. So I respect that everyone that might not be everyone's cup of tea, but I think we're wired to drink in sunlight. So the more we can get on her skin and her eyeballs, I think it creates a wonderful, palette, I guess, I'd say for for having a wonderful day. We have, our windows open today. It's a beautiful fall day, and I've been inside way too much. I should have been outside more, but the Bengals played. So, you know, I hear you. Yeah. But we have this fountain in the front of our buyer front door, and we have the windows open so you can really hear the water today. And I love it. And I'm going to open those kitchen windows more so I can hear that sound inside. So that's another way you get for your friends that don't wanna be outside sweaty or whatever. You know, is there a way that you can bring the outside noises in? And maybe it just means opening your windows and listening to the bird. Sir. Or your fountain. I think that is absolutely brilliant. I did not used to be a house plants person. I thought I'd do everything. But I was able to keep a peace lily alive that was a gift when my stepdad died. And slowly, I built up a nice little forest in my foyer of plants. I have some peace lilies. I have some succulents. And oddly, I have a few 2 poinsettias that were gifts that I've managed to keep alive. And I know that really is not outdoors. I know these are houseplants, but, you know, plants recycle, used carbon dioxide and give us oxygen. So if you happen to be a plant person, bring some plants inside and enjoy them as well. I love that. I've I've been growing my plant collection too. Maybe it's a midlife thing. Maybe it is. Maybe we're nurturing plant life now. Instead of people. I don't know. I know. I know. Yeah. So I've really enjoyed this conversation between rest and sleep. There was I just wanted to point out some other ways to physically rest how that looks because, when you're working out, you cannot work out. That's how you can take a physical rest from working out. But you can also rest within a workout. And, as a former cross fitter or if you're from a former, I don't know, go go go kind of exercise, it's okay to rest more within your workout. Love that. Yeah. So that's just another way rest can show up. And then I already mentioned more rest days between actual workouts. So You know, I love the recovery walk or the recovery ride. Like, those are limitless when it comes to midlife. I think. I think it's part of just moving more, just moving more in midlife, but it's okay to rest more in your workouts. I just wanted to make sure I heard that. And I and I do love that I think that's a wonderful it's wonderful advice because if you are one of those go go goers, like you mentioned, it's hard to embrace that. And I just think just in general, the idea of more rest is is peaceful. You know, you you are more than your age, but I don't believe that age is only a number. I do believe that there's physiologic changes that happen in midlife, and I don't want to ignore that and try to pretend that I'm not 56. I'm 56. I'm a very, very healthy 56, but I'm embracing that. And for me, that looks like more more rest and more joy. And I think part of it is changing your mind about it. Do you think that's the biggest challenge? Oh, yeah. But once you change your mind about how your body is functioning now and what your workouts should look like or what your life should look like. Then once you get rid of the shoulds and you just are present to who you are at this mommas, It's a lot easier. A lot easier and a lot more fun. Thank for listening today, you can find us on instagram@midlife.mommas. For all of our other contact info, check out the show description below. And we will talk to you next week.